"A few days later Felix came back with his wife, Drusilla, who was Jewish. Sending for Paul, they listened as he told them about faith in Christ Jesus. As he reasoned with them about righteousness and self-control and the coming day of judgment, Felix became frightened. 'Go away for now,” he replied. “When it is more convenient, I’ll call for you again.' He also hoped that Paul would bribe him, so he sent for him quite often and talked with him." Acts 24:24-26 NLT
Although the text of the rest of this chapter appears that the Roman Governor Felix was just delaying Paul's case for political expediency and favor with the Jews, the fact that he kept Paul in conversation and made him as comfortable as possible in while in custody shows that there was a deeper conflict going on in side of him. He knew that in reality Paul had done no wrong and his personal curiosity about early Christianity proves God was tapping him on the shoulder just like He did for many of us. Even being curious about it was political and possibly literal suicide for a Roman official because the official Roman policy on Christianity was one of persecution. So for Him to talk to Paul outside of official proceedings was risky at best. The reality is still that Felix missed a blessing because he procrastinated in doing what he knew in his heart was right regardless of the risks.
Many times in recovery we're just like that. God is tapping us on the shoulder about something in our lives that needs to change, whether is was the destructive behavior that got us here, or a new bondage that we've substituted with or just the latest character defect that is causing us or others harm, but we continue to procrastinate because we don't really want to give up what is holding us back. It may also be that God is calling us to something, such as a new level of service, or going back to school or starting a business, but because of our fears, inadequacies, or low self esteem we put it off. Many times our willingness to procrastinate comes from being lulled into a distorted sense of comfortability by those same inadequacies. Our minds tell us we are fine where we are, why put ourselves out there? We forget that God will never ask us to do something without giving us the ability to accomplish it.
We need to understand that procrastination is only holding us back from a deeper relationship with God, moving further in our recovery and realizing our full potential in Christ.
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